Motherhood is kicking my butt, but… I refuse to act like everything’s okay all of the time. God doesn’t want us to murmur and complain but sometimes you need to talk! It’s okay to say “Girl today was rough” or “This week was challenging pray for me”. I was 28 with a 3 year old, a 2 year old, and a newborn and it was hard. But I hardly ever expressed that to anyone. I had a “I’ll just pray mindset”. I felt that it was wrong to spend too much time talking because most conversations instantly turned into gossip but recently I came across a scripture that challenged that mindset.
The last few months I found myself expressing things that I normally wouldn’t to people but afterwards I would find myself feeling bad wondering to myself “Did I say too much?”) Or did I burden them with that? The conversations all went well, they were edifying and encouraging but something was bothering me because this was new to me, until I stumbled across Malachi 3:16
The Lord began to show me that there’s nothing wrong with talking, it’s the content of the conversation that get’s us in trouble with God. But I am coming to believe that talking to fellow believers is a necessity. I believe holding stuff in is dangerous. God as a refuge is most important but you need trustworthy people who you believe can hold water to talk to about the issues plaguing you as well especially if you’re in a season where your prayer life is shaky. I’m not saying use them as your dumpster or gossip partner and call everyday with garbage but something like “Gyrl I’m trying but I’m really struggling with this”, is not poison to the other person. They may just have a word for you!
(Proverbs 11:13) One way I’ve learned to differentiate between a talebearer and someone with a faithful spirit is by their conversation. If they are telling you everyone’s business don’t tell them personal things that you don’t wish for everyone to know.
In motherhood my biggest struggle is the fact that you can’t just get up and do what you want anymore. Sometimes you may have something you would like to do but it’s not as easy as “I’m going to workout” anymore. Just this morning I was up around 5 am a time where my children are usually sleeping so I was excited to spend time with God. I pulled out my Bible and Concordance but before I knew it my 1 year old was up and ready to play. Sometimes things don’t workout the way you hope and that can be discouraging especially as the years progress. I have learned that you may think you are alone but it doesn’t have to be that way there’s a world full of people with godly wisdom so don’t be afraid to speak up. For example, aside from motherhood I really dislike my voice. This week I expressed that to four people and they said they dislike their voice too. That surprised me but now I’m like oh okay I’m not as screwed up as I thought lol. You are not even alone in your struggle like we usually think we are. Many are there now or have been there we just have to open our mouth.
Lord there’s truly no one like you. You are the best listener point blank period! You are our refuge. A true friend. A safe place. The One who has our best interest without a doubt. We don’t aim to put anyone in your place or above you in our lives but we ask that you would give us godly relationships. Your word tells us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers so we ask that you would connect us with the right people. Even if it’s one person or two we pray for some godly individuals to talk to in our lives. In Jesus name we pray. Amen
Malachi 3:16 King James Version (KJV)
16 Then they that feared the Lord spake often one to another: and the Lord hearkened, and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before him for them that feared the Lord, and that thought upon his name.